So tired

I’m tired of being tired.
I’m sick of being sick.
All but my inner circle
Seem to think I’m thick.

I’m tired of futile input.
I’m sick of doctors, all.
Even the inner circle
Seem to think I’m weak.

I’m tired of watching life
go by, of sickness being all.
Who are we, really, when
Hope has left the ball?

I’m tired of being tired;
Sick of being sick.
I thought I used to be someone,
But even I now know I’m not.

Existential agonies.

I’m done.


… Black Eye (with any luck)

I’d never had a black eye in my life, until 6 months ago. Suddenly I’m falling asleep all the time (literally collapsing) and waking up in truly odd places: the floor of the shower, the kitchen, the floor next to my bed, facedown in the flower garden (that was more of an 18-hour blackout, I woke up in the ER), sideways off the toilet into the shower or off the other side into the vanity, etc.

So, one day, I tripped over the bathmat. I came to, wedged into the corner between the toilet and vanity, blood everywhere. (Secret squirrel link to blood pic, skip if you prefer not to see it.) Split my forehead from hairline to eyebrow.

Massively bodged stitching job from the ER nurse, went to a plastics guy the next day:

Two (“count them! Two! Ah! Ah! Ah!”) black eyes.Didn’t take any pictures of the next one, but then two days ago, I pulled off this nifty trick:

On the plus side, you can hardly see the scar!

I could happily go these last 10 months without another one.

… Visit From These Friends

We’ve got friends staying with us at the moment, both expats we knew – or knew of – from PNG. He’s been here a few times on his way to other places, and we co-admin a few FB Pages relevant to our international community, but I hadn’t met his wife until their wedding day. It was a bit like a typical high school reunion, in that people you haven’t seen in 15 years wander past you, but ours include people from any and all graduation year/s. Continue reading “… Visit From These Friends”

… New Year’s Day

… New Year’s Day

I’ve never been much of a believer in “Resolutions At The Stroke Of Midnight”, so I have none of those to share.

My worst NYD, however, follows on directly from my best NYE. I’d decided at the last minute that I was NOT going to spend this epic (’99/’00) NYE at home by myself, so I’d made my way into town, through all the hundreds of thousands of revellers, by myself. Continue reading “… New Year’s Day”